Seven of the most disturbing truths about marriage

[ahlam1399]

http://img-s-msn-com.akamaized.net/tenant/amp/entityid/BBnpLmk.img?h=100&w=100&m=6&q=60&o=f&l=fWhen one person asked for the most disturbing truth about marriage, Ellen Vrana couldn't narrow it down to one... There are many disturbing truths. To me, the most disturbing is how the actual thing is so vastly different than anything it's purported to be. Marriage is **t unconditional love. There is hate. Resentment. There is bitterness, isolation, betrayal and pain. I don't feel love for my husband 24 hours a day, 365 days a year. **r does he. Marriage has inertia. There are times when we can**t access our love. Sometimes, it's marriage - **t love - that keeps us married. This thing manifest in shared cutlery and mattresses, Thanksgiving rituals and holiday cards - this thing sometimes keeps us together. Marriage is **t the agent **r the perfection of you. It doesn't fill your *****s and make you complete. It's **t what you're missing in life. It's **t the fulfilment of your true self. Marriage doesn't do anything; it - perhaps - allows you to do things. Marriage is **t e**ugh. Marriage is **t a signal of success or achievement to the world. I've done this, I'm married, stop worrying, stop doubting. Perhaps for a while, but **t for long. **t for ever. The what's next questions persist. And **thing - **t even marriage - is immune. Marriage can be a bad thing. Marriage endures beyond lies, beyond broken trust, broken dreams - if you want it to, it can. Marriages - good marriages, ones that work - must exist in dark spaces too, **t just the light. Marriage has ** baseline. With a few exceptions, there is ** standard of what is good, **rmal, acceptable, and what is **t. ** one can tell you what to do with it, about it, it is entirely your responsibility to manage your marriage. There is ** right answer so don't seek one. Marriage is bigger than you. Bigger than both of you. If my answer sounds like marriage is this mythical thing that cuddles in bed with you and your spouse and at times steals sheets - that's because it is. Well, it's **t mythical, but it's there, amorphous. It's the third thing, between you, in your relationship. It's a responsibility, a commitment, a power, a profound intimacy. Ensuring we are seen, witnessed and bound to a**ther before we expire. More than any other social institution we have as humans. (Paying taxes **twithstanding). More: These are the best and worst ages to get married

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